Weddings overflow with joy, celebration, and change. Capturing all the emotions of the day in a wedding card that actually shows you care can be difficult. Many wedding guests are at a loss about what to write in a wedding card, so here's a quick guide to help you wish the bride and groom well with a personal touch.
What to Write in a Wedding Card to Show That You Care
So, how do you know what to write in a wedding card? The pattern is simple. Include a celebratory exclamation, a thought that connects you to them, a celebration of their connection to each other, and a thank you for the invitation to their wedding.
While the pattern is simple, it may help to dive into more detail for each of the components. We've done the research for you, so all you need to do is use this guide to string together your memories and thoughts into a card that shows you care.
The Components of a Written Card
The Opening Greeting
Write the opening greeting of the card to reflect your comfort level and familiarity with the couple. If you are more likely to address them with "hello" instead of "hey," then lean toward "Congratulations" over "Congrats!" Whatever your tone, start with a celebratory exclamation! Some options could include:
Think of what you would say to them in person on their wedding day, and feel free to write that here. Take into consideration the level of formality of both the wedding and the couple. If you would not start a conversation with "woohoo!" then it's better to begin your card with something calmer or more formal.
A Personal Connection
You really begin showing that you care with the second sentence of your card. Here, you can include something that connects you personally to the bride and/or groom. If you are only close with one of them, feel free to direct your comment directly to that person. Some examples of directing your connection to only one person could be:
If you have a special or long-lasting relationship with one member of the couple, emphasize it here. Doing so will give them a chance to feel appreciated for something they've done or else re-live a happy memory they have with you.
If you're lucky enough to know both of the couple, include a memory the three of you share. Although it can be, it doesn't need to be a meaningful memory. Choose something that is important to you, or a memory that makes you smile, and include it here. Some examples could be:
Any personal connection that you have outside of the specifics of the wedding will be appreciated and treasured!
A Connection between the Bride and Groom
Next, you want to acknowledge the bride and groom as a couple and point out whatever you see in their relationship that is special. While your personal memories made the card meaningful, the day is ultimately about them and their love.
Hopefully, you have had time around the couple and have been able to notice their interaction with each other. Point out what's great!
Every couple loves hearing about what a great couple they are.
Some options could include:
When thinking about what to write in a wedding card about the couple, focus on whatever is genuine and good about their relationship that you've noticed. Now is the time to emphasize it.
If you have not had the privilege of knowing the couple together, you still have some options. You can either lean on your knowledge of one person or else phrase your celebration of the couple as a hope or wish for the future. For example:
Anything that you can say genuinely about the couple now or in the future is a good choice. Overall, your goal is to acknowledge the couple's love, commitment, or happiness on their special day.
A Thank-You for the Invitation
Any married person can tell you that creating a wedding guest list is difficult. Being invited to a wedding is an honor that deserves a thank you.
Make sure to include a thanks for being invited, even if you aren't able to attend the wedding. These can take any form, depending on your relationship with the bride and groom.
Some examples could include:
To make sure that your card shows that you care, keep your words similar to how you would speak to them in person. Do not be more formal or casual than your daily interactions with them. When it comes to what to write in a wedding card, a genuine card is a caring card.
And finally, a sign-off! This is where you wrap up your card and let them know who it's from. As with the rest of the card, you will want to keep it consistent with how you interact with them regularly.
While options vary as widely as people do, some good choices are:
Don't be overly formal if you're not formal in person. Make sure this is reflective of you and your relationship. If you are writing a card that's from you and someone else, make sure to have them sign their own name. It's extra steps like this that show that you care.
Bonus: What to Include in the P.S.
While the P.S. is not necessary, it can be a nice addition to make the wedding card feel more personal and less formulaic. A P.S. can add a level of informality that may not be appropriate in all occasions, but in other situations may be a welcome demonstration of closeness. Use your judgment to know if a P.S. may be right for your situation.
A Reference to Your Gift
A P. S. is an appropriate place to include a reference to your gift. You don't want to spoil the surprise, but if you can add details, stories, or hopes regarding your gift without naming it directly, this is a fun place to do so.
Gifts, including money, should not be specifically named. Give the surrounding information and let them fill in the missing piece once they've opened the gift. For example:
Warning: What to Avoid in Wedding Cards
Mention of Amounts of Money
If you give money, do not mention the specific dollar amount. You are welcome to reference the gift and your hopes for it, but keep the specifics to your checkbook. Please be aware that they will also likely not mention the specific amount in their thank-you card. This is part of wedding etiquette, but you can rest safe knowing that they received their generous gift even if the specifics aren't mentioned.
Even if you are sarcastic with your friend in person, do not include it in the card. It is possible that the card will be read by someone who is not familiar with your sense of humor, and you do not want to risk hurting feelings on a wedding day.
If you have anything negative to say, do not include it in the wedding card. This could range from difficulties traveling to the wedding, insecurity about whether you'll get the time off, reservations about the spouse-to-be, or anything else that comes off as less than enthusiastic. There is no place for negativity in a wedding card.
Hopefully now you have a better idea of what to write in a wedding card! If you write from your heart about your relationship with the couple and their relationship with each other, you are on the right track! Keep it positive and reflective of your relationship. Soon, you'll be able to write wedding cards with ease, and the recipients will always know that you care.